Your intent to find love will make all the difference in your success.
So here we go again! We’re past the halfway mark in January and the talk now is how to re-start or maintain resolutions. The pressure is still on to “make a change!” Is it hard to not buy that? After all, it is well intended. I mean, who could argue with the goal of self-improvement or finding love? And so most of us willingly go along and declare, “this is the year that I finally stick to my resolution.”
But is this what you really want? Is finding a partner about you or something else?
Lots of us crave love from a romantic relationship and make finding one a goal for the New Year. Reasons range from another year gone by to getting older or feeling like it’s now or never. The thing is a relationship may be doomed from the start if the intention behind it is out of fear, angst or loneliness. My thought is, the purer the intent, the better the outcome. If you intend to date with the intention to bring love, value and family into someone’s life, the result is more favorable than, say, having someone to sleep with on the weekends.
Your intent must align with the outcome you want because this will guide your actions behind it. For example, what if your goal is to find a long-term relationship that will lead to marriage? Should you hang out at a club or bar hoping to run into a fine hottie with confidence and strong family values? Maybe, it has happened. However, if an LTR is your intent with someone you can love the rest of your life, you’re more likely to find that in a community setting or through a professional service. Of course, if you intend to find endless hookups this year, there are plenty of dating apps readily available.
As we move towards the end of January, lets consider our intent for a relationship this year. Consider the role it will play in your life and why it holds importance. And by all means, if you realize that you’re not ready for a relationship, i.e. exclusivity, honesty and commitment, refrain from attempting to go on dates with people who are. It’s not fair to them and ultimately, not fair to you either. When your intent is to be better it affects not only you, but also everyone you bring into your orbit.