Everyone knows that relationships take time, effort and commitment to work. The end results are often times not what we expect them to be, yet a select few are pleasantly surprised. So tell me, why do you want a relationship?
Ok, I know. It's a hard question to answer, right? Why do you think that is? Have you even thought of asking yourself that question before? Probably not because it’s too much thinking and processing to manage, especially when it comes to matters of the heart.
First, let me be clear, I’m not asking what you want from love. I’m asking what you want from a relationship. Love and a relationship are two different things. They are not interchangeable or synonymous. One is a feeling, an emotion that is based on inspiration from within. The other is an external partnership based on an emotional, physical or mental connection that is bound by trust and commitment. Love is internal and inspires thought and action. Whereas interpersonal relationships are a byproduct of love.
When we seek a relationship we look for someone we can relate to, a person who will understand who we are without judgement and/or expectation. We want a person to be close with who will make us feel comfortable, safe, wanted and loved. The level of comfort we gain from a romantic relationship is rarely found in other parts of our lives. For that reason, relationships or the search of one, dominates a large portion of our lives.
The question is why?
If you are single and actively seek a man or woman to share your intimate self, what role will that relationship play in your life overall? Is it a situation that you really need, or is it a familial or societal pressure you’re trying to quell?
Does a relationship move you closer to the goal of being married, being a parent, or is it for financial reasons?
Consider the elements of your life you will subsequently change if, and/or when, you enter into a relationship. Are those elements of your life (that you’re willing to give up, or alter) just to accommodate a relationship, things you refuse to give up even when you find the relationship you want?
Ultimately, what will a relationship do for you and is there any other way for you to get what you want without it?